November 14, 1998
Scary Monkey of the Day
Well, the title is a poor attempt at a joke. The joke's a funny one, to me at least. And to anyone else in Services Reception at Creative Solutions. At least, Jo and Theresa and I found it hilarious. Trust me, it's probably a location joke (ie, you had to be there).
I'm not laughing a lot tonight though. It's almost impossible to explain online life to someone who's never experienced it, how close you can get to someone thousands of miles away, even though you've never seen them. At the risk of stumbling onto an overused cliche, there's a feeling of community, almost. That's how I feel about Emerald Dreams. I love that place. But right now, it's not a comfortable place to be. Like any small-ish community, there are squabbles and cliques and rivalries. Until tonight, I was able to ignore them. I feel betrayed by a friend who, rather than talking to me about something he was upset about, went over my head and made a complaint against me.
I should explain, a little. I'm a staff member on that MUSH, which basically means I help run some of the aspects of the place. In my case, I help out with character approvals and help clarify some game rules and so on. Sometimes people get unhappy with staff on a MUSH.
This I can understand.
Sometimes when people get unhappy with staff on a MUSH, they do some pretty rotten things.
This also I can understand.
However, I've been accused of things by this particular friend which are untrue and the result of jealousy and immaturity.
This I do not understand.
Ya know, I wish you would have talked to me, before doing what you did. All I can say is: how petty is that, to try and drag me down because I don't play with you enough, or whatever.
Ironically, the person involved will probably never read this, and I'll probably never confront him either. But some of you who read this will know who and what I mean, exactly. Even more ironically, the two who will understand the best are the other two accused. Ah, fuck it. I'm babbling to myself.
Congrats. The Scary Monkey of the Day award definitely goes to you. You earned it.
