June 10, 2000
Cheaper Than Therapy
Yes, it's a rare weekend edition of, well... me. That picture was taken moments before I yielded to the insane heat once more and put my hair up again. I took down to take a shower, then left it down while it dried. It's hot here in Michigan. Or, rather, it was hot earlier today. I have a feeling it's much cooler outside, and just hasn't cooled off in here yet.
It's been a fairly relaxing day. I didn't do a whole lot, aside from some work and worry about moving and apartment hunting, and getting some things done for that. Everything is still so completely up in the air, I can scarcely see it. I am trying extremely hard not to stress about it, however. Most of the time, I'm succeeding. Actually, let me rephrase that. I'm trying not to stress about it, while at the same time, actually being responsible about the whole thing, rather than just burying my head in the sand and ignoring it.
I did some surfing around earlier tonight and came across a nifty little site: imood.com. That's the new little image in the upper right hand corner of the entry. Since part of my treatment for depression involves keeping track of my moods, I figure I'd let everybody else in on it too. I imagine it'll only change when I do a new entry, and whatever my current mood is will be reflected on all the entries.
I'm feeling a little blocked, writing-wise. I had some great roleplay last night on Something Wicked, but other than that, nothing. I'm waiting for feedback on two recent stories -- one from my 'professional' editor and one from my 'personal' editor, i.e., Brand. I think I'm feeling stalled because I'm a little anxious about what they'll say. I should just fire up the word processor and throw myself into one of the stories I have outlined, and just do it. Oddly, with each project I complete and feel happy with, the more anxious I get when I go to start the next project. I've had such an incredible string of luck lately, I'm just certain that sooner or later I'm going to fall on my face.
And you know what? I will. Sooner or later, I'm going to write something absolutely sucky. I need to just quit worrying about it and write anyway. Then if it sucks, toss it or rewrite it. I need to get over the idea that the first draft needs to be nearly perfect. Besides, everyone knows you learn more from mistakes than from successes anyway. And heaven knows I have a lot to learn here.
Heh. I promise, this is not going to become solely a writing journal. No, I shouldn't promise that. It very well might. Writing is something I'm feeling remarkably passionate about right now. The success I'm having there is bleeding over into the rest of my life and making things easier to deal with. I can't argue with results like that. It's a hell of a lot cheaper than therapy.
Posted by Lisa at June 10, 2000 11:26 PM
