June 14, 2000
Missing
This is not shaping up to be a good day. Max is missing. I'm sitting here at work trying not to go nuts with worry. Since I've had the windows open at night, he started sitting in the window of whatever room I was in, pouncing on the bugs outside. I was worried sooner or later that he might knock the screen out of the window, but not horribly worried. Well, last night, he did, and fell outside.
It wasn't a far fall, certainly not enough to hurt him, so I headed outside to get him. He wasn't anywhere to be seen. It was dark, so I called and called to him. Nothing. I went back in and got the flashlight. I wandered around my neighbors' yards, calling for him. Nothing. After about an hour of frantic searching, I went back inside. Every so often I went back to the door and called. I woke up this morning just after dawn and ran to the door, hoping he'd be there, sheepish and hungry. Nothing.
I'm worried to death. Max is my baby. He's been with me through a lot of things, good and bad. He's never been outside for more than ten minutes at a time, and that was with me watching him. He's declawed. I'm trying to be optimistic, but I'm certain, deep inside, that I'm never going to see him again. I hope I'm wrong. I've never wanted to be wrong so badly in my life.
I miss him. I think he probably misses me too, and I'm hoping that's what will bring him home. I missed him sleeping on my feet last night. The hem of my nightgown brushed my calf this morning, and I thought it was him. The little guy is a huge part of my life, and if he's gone for good, it's going to leave an equally huge hole.
I haven't cried about this yet. I've been close, but stopped, because I felt like I was being 'silly'. I've felt hysterics threatening, though, and I have a feeling the break might come tonight, if he's still not home.
Aside from looking through my neighborhood, I'm going to post signs tomorrow morning if he's not back. Then I'm going to call the shelters to see if he got picked up. Beyond that, all I can do is wait. I'm horrible at waiting.
But I'm even worse at losing pets.
Posted by Lisa at June 14, 2000 11:39 AM
