November 14, 1998
Scary Monkey of the Day
Well, the title is a poor attempt at a joke. The joke's a funny one, to me at least. And to anyone else in Services Reception at Creative Solutions. At least, Jo and Theresa and I found it hilarious. Trust me, it's probably a location joke (ie, you had to be there).
I'm not laughing a lot tonight though. It's almost impossible to explain online life to someone who's never experienced it, how close you can get to someone thousands of miles away, even though you've never seen them. At the risk of stumbling onto an overused cliche, there's a feeling of community, almost. That's how I feel about Emerald Dreams. I love that place. But right now, it's not a comfortable place to be. Like any small-ish community, there are squabbles and cliques and rivalries. Until tonight, I was able to ignore them. I feel betrayed by a friend who, rather than talking to me about something he was upset about, went over my head and made a complaint against me.
I should explain, a little. I'm a staff member on that MUSH, which basically means I help run some of the aspects of the place. In my case, I help out with character approvals and help clarify some game rules and so on. Sometimes people get unhappy with staff on a MUSH.
This I can understand.
Sometimes when people get unhappy with staff on a MUSH, they do some pretty rotten things.
This also I can understand.
However, I've been accused of things by this particular friend which are untrue and the result of jealousy and immaturity.
This I do not understand.
Ya know, I wish you would have talked to me, before doing what you did. All I can say is: how petty is that, to try and drag me down because I don't play with you enough, or whatever.
Ironically, the person involved will probably never read this, and I'll probably never confront him either. But some of you who read this will know who and what I mean, exactly. Even more ironically, the two who will understand the best are the other two accused. Ah, fuck it. I'm babbling to myself.
Congrats. The Scary Monkey of the Day award definitely goes to you. You earned it.
Saturdays Are Just One Long Night
Is there a lazier time than a gray Saturday afternoon? I dunno, maybe there is, but right now, it seems like there couldn't possibly be. There are SO many things I should be doing, but here I sit, sorta not really on a MUSH (Emerald Dreams), just typing the randomness that will be this journal entry.
You can see by the time, it's 3 in the afternoon, but I've only been awake since about 1 or so. Typical. Actually, that's pretty early for me on Saturday, but then, I went to bed fairly early last night. 3 AM. I think that's the earliest I've gone to bed all week. I got home from gaming, found out that I'd missed Brand and James, nothing else was going on online, so I went to bed. So far today, I've managed to call my long-lost cousin Sheri to reassure her that I didn't fall off the face of the earth, and I've managed to stay in bed and read - Here Be Dragons by Sharon Kay Penman. Awesome book. I recommend it highly.
Gaming last night. Just, wow. Chris just never ceases to amaze me. I have a hard enough time finding a voice for my one character, but he just comes up with voices for this entire cast of NPCs, it's incredible. I'm excited about this new campaign. I can tell already it's as much about character development and interaction as it is about solving mysteries and catching bad guys. And NO DICE ROLLING! Not to mention that I get to play with three people who are rapidly becoming favorites of mine: Jo (a woman I work with) Chris (her husband) and Jeff (their friend, and mine too). The three of them will hereafter be referred to by some witty nickname that I don't have the brain to think up right now. Or maybe not. I'd almost forgotten how nice it is to actually have friends in the same city as me.
(On a side note, I'm sitting here watching Hollingsworth abuse Max, my cat. This too, is a Saturday ritual. They bug each other continually.)
I've managed to write for 30 minutes and not really reveal much at all, haven't I? I impress myself at times. I'm not in much of a confessional mood today. Maybe I'm still too much into Nancy, my character from last night's game. Nancy's all about walls, and putting up a good front. Ah well, maybe I'll come out with some deep personal revelation later. No promises though.
For now, it's time to go back to bed, I think. I gotta go see what's up with Llewelyn, Joanna and King John. Happy Saturday.
