La Vie Boheme

Fear

I haven't really written anything seriously since finishing The Exile's Daughter in October. I've outlined, I've futzed with things here and there, but nothing for real. I've had a hard time focusing on anything, finishing anything. So here I sit, ready to get back to work, and I'm afraid. And I have no idea what I'm afraid of.

Well that's not exactly true. I'm afraid of what every writer is afraid of. I'm afraid that the words aren't there, that the blank Word doc is just going to taunt me. I'm afraid that I don't want this badly enough, that I'll never manage more than a story credit or two here and there. But mostly, I'm afraid that I can't do it again, that the muse won't show up with the right scene idea or phrase or even the right punctuation mark at the right time.

But mostly, I'm afraid of finding out that my fears are well-founded.

Damn it, "The Brigand" is outlined. I still love the story idea. It's time to just sit down and hammer the words out and just get over the damn fence already. Whether I jump it gracefully or land on my face on the other side, either way I'm still over it.